I drove home from work today. No, I didn’t buy a car. I rented one so I could go buy one. I’ll take some pictures of it a little later.

One of the things I’m really looking forward to with my new car is going to the shop and buying sixty cans of Mountain Dew. And lots of beer too. I might look into getting a microwave as well. Oh the fun.

I don’t know what I’m doing tonight but you can bet you britches that it will involve driving there. I won’t be eating from the food court either. Now that I have wheels Salt Lake City is literally my oyster.

Ahhhh yes. I expect lots of things to happen this weekend. I shall you keep you, my loyal reader, informed as they do.

There is a place in Utah called The Hotel, formerly know as Shaggy’s. Crazy stuff happens in this place. I believe Shaggy’s is under new management, hence the name change. One of the improvements that has been added is what I like to call the wall of time.

Every night at smack bang 12:30 the wall of Time displays the message

Last Call in 30:00 mins

. Needless to say this results in every Irish man in the place (that would be me and johnny) panicking as they realise they only have 30 short minutes to get in the rest of the drink for the night. As you can imagine this can make for some messy situations and/or entertaining stories.

The first time this happened there was a lot of demanding in loud voices that the barmaid remember “Us Irish Guys”. I also remember asking that same barmaid why she got the tattoo’s she did.

Before we went to The Hotel the next night, we stopped off in Murphy’s. It was a saturday night and didn’t appear to be that busy. We say at the end of the bar and got talking to a guy named Todd who was a trucker from florida. He wasn’t exactly a trucker any more, as he has stopped driving and now just does the loading and unloading for a removal company. After a few pints in Murphy’s Todd decided to move on to another place. He talked me and another guy from saudi arabia into going with him and I talked John into going with us (I think John was scared of Todd). We went to The Hotel and after a bottle of beer decided to call it a night.

The last time we went to The Hotel, which was when I wrote that last post, we went to the Port O’Call. Mostly out of fear of meeting Todd. We sat near a TV and discussed various things including the pros and cons of getting some sort of ninja tattoo. Then at around 11:30 we left for The Hotel. The actual Hotel door had a massive queue but the Elevate door which is just another door to The Hotel had a small queue. One of the bouncers there asked us were he knew us from. Unable to tell him he let us go with a “Come to me next time and you’ll get in faster as VIP’s”. I think he did any way the beers were clouding my brain.

Once in the Hotel I went to the jacks were I was surprised to see a bathroom attendant. I think I gave him a $10 tip by accident.

Out at the bar Johnny was ordering 2 bottles of Bud. While he was doing that I was staring at the two girls dancing together on top of the woofer. The women love the woofer. Eventually Johnny got served. At some stage someone suggested shots and then it all went pear shaped.

I remember the clock starting, taking ages to get served and Johnny coming up to me to say that he was going to get his own drinks. I then remember drinking two Gin and Juice fast enough to nearly get sick. After calming down the gag reflex I went back to the bar. I had noticed on a previous trip that they sold Killians and I aimed to get some. The tattooed Barmaid was working and I went to her area. A girl infront of me got served and I prepared to slide into her place when I heard a “Hey, Hey” behind me and some guy cut a head. Shocked, that a person from Crowded Bar Land such as myself could have such an amateur moved pulled on him I used the age old technique of “The Hand on the Bar” to ensure my place in the line. It turned out that such a move was not required as the tattoo girl remembered me (I think) and got my order.

With the sweet nectar that is killians now firmly in my grasp I returned to my previous position near the Dancing Girls on the Woofer. John told me that two women had asked him to by them a drink (I think they did it seperately). He didn’t not realising things are different here in America. I then proceeded to tell him and every one else in the club that “It’s all about the number”. John went somewhere and I dropped my pint on the floor. Seeing as how they had stopped serving and we had bud light in the fridge we decided to leave.

When we arrived back at the apartment we listened to some music on Johnny’s computer and possibly woke the downstairs neighbours. After that I went and wrote that post then i fell asleep.

That was my saturday night. Who knows what’s going to happen this weekend. I’m renting a car to kind of get back in the swing of things and to go look at cars that are for sale. More on that later.

“I asure you officer I’ve only had a few ales.”

As you may have guessed I have been drinking. I was drinking last week and many an intersting happened back then too. Not going to talk about them as I am having some trouble typing. Suffice it to say J to the G is shit with women and that I love tatoos.

I know that doesn’t make much sense. Perhaps in the future I shall elaborate.

I’ve been playing a lot more with pandora. I absolutly love it. If I could get it on my IPod I’d be ecstatic.

I set up a radio station using the song Going Up the Country by Canned Heat and it keeps playing excellent blues songs which I’ve never heard of before.

I got a little tired of that so I created a Dream Theatre station which I’m currently listening too. It just played Octavarium. I’ve never heard it and I have to say that I have been completely blown away by it. I am in Prog heaven.

You have to be in america to become a member, but they just ask for a zip code (84101) to prove that you are.

From a membership point of view, they have subscription which has no ads and a free membership which is exactly the same but with ads.

Sound quality is good aswell as the site streams at 128kpbs which sounds almost as good as a CD.

Before I came over to America one of the big things that I was worried about was cursing. After all I curse a lot. Especially when I am in a social situation. I figured (correctly) that Mormons wouldn’t curse.

Instead of Damn they say Dang. And I think that’s the worst I heard coming out of a Mormon. Imagine my surprise when I heard that two of my mormon friends where fans of Sublime. The thing about sublime is that they aren’t exactly the most wholesome band going. They liberally use bad language in their songs and well… here’s the lyrics to the first verse of Wrong Way.

annie's 12 years old in two more 
she'll be a whore, nobody ever told
her it's the wrong way. don't be 
afraid with the quickness you get 
laid for your family gets paid it's 
the wrong way. 

What’s a bad language hating, good music loving Mormon to do. Why remove the bad language of course. And that’s exactly what one of them did. He also reorganized the album so that all the songs that had objectionable content like the above were removed from the album Sublime.

Apparently this was so well done you couldn’t tell the difference. It wasn’t. See for yourself. here are two mp3’s. The first is What I Got (The Mormon Remix), the second is What I Got (original).

Listen to the first one and tell me if you can see where the bad language has been removed. If you can post it in the comments.

If you look on the right there you will see a thing with my favorite* songs. This is from the ultra cool website Pandora which lets you build an online radio station. You provide it with a song and it builds a radio station of songs like the one you entered. It’s class.

Their color* scheme doesn’t go with my color scheme but I plan on fixing that soon.

*look at me, using american spelling.